Gunnard Michael Sippert
Jon: When and where were you gifted upon the earth?
Gunny: May 27, 1999, Oshkosh, Wisconsin
J: What did you do for fun as a child?
G: Spent time with neighbors and family
J: What is your fondest high school memory?
G: There’s so much to choose from. Umm… I don’t know. The two regional championships were pretty awesome.
J: Do you prefer commentating basketball or baseball?
G: I think I prefer baseball, because there’s more downtime. Basketball is just too much sometimes. More time to breathe.
J: What is your theory about Joe Buck?
G: Joe Buck is a product of his color commentator. Troy Aikman is the problem. When Joe Buck commentates baseball, he’s actually good, because John Smoltz as his color is awesome. But Troy Aikman for football is awful.
J: Were you, or were you not, indeed involved in an alleged mosh pit that allegedly took place in Prof [redacted]’s house after a certain college basketball team lost this year?
G: No *winks
J: Do you have any words of advice for the kiddos?
G: Reach out if you need help. Everybody here is qualified to help you in terms of fellowship.
J: Any last words?
G: David ate his Swiss roll.
Favorites:
Sport to play: Soccer
Sports Team: Minnesota Wild
Lunch Meal: Lemon Chicken
School Club: Broadcast Club
Prof: Schierenbeck
High School Class: Calculus
In Ten Years….
David: He’s gonna be the new Joe Buck, except commentate Vikings games instead of Packers games. He is also gonna be a math tutor to the NFL players. In the summer, he will visit every single MLB stadium and steal something from every ballpark and hang it up.
Faith: He’s a broadcaster for the Minnesota Wild. It took him awhile to get the job because he was too sarcastic and people couldn’t tell what was actually happening, but now he’s successful with his own bingo board. He’s got a dog named after Leslie Odom, Jr. and a room where the walls are all chalkboards (to fill with math problems).
James: After 10 years, Gunny’s underground tunnel system spans all the major sporting arenas. He will live in the tunnel and each day choosing a new game to watch. His food will be stadium food; his drink will be 72 oz pops. He is such a renowned commentator that no matter where he goes he is asked to commentate and teach the professionals how it is done.